The essay about my carer’s life “ My CAT rolled on the MAT “

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Here is Mr. Fukui’s essay. He moved to his mother’s house in a southern prefecture from northern Japan to care for her, leaving his beloved wife and cats.

I want to put paw pads on my nose

My caregiving time alone in Kumamoto Prefecture to take after my mother has become longer, but what I’m worried about in a distant house in Sapporo is our cats.

Nearly 40 years of marriage with my partner is almost the same as living together with a cat. So far, we have lived together at home, and already looked after 3 cats, and 2 married cats currently living together, a total of 5 cats. I never thought that the living without cats around me would leave such a big hole in my heart. I discuss with my partner, understand each other, and choose different lives, so I can try to endure it rather than being able to “be firm” while having a little bit of a hard, but about the separation from cats It’s not logical. It’s a bare loneliness. I don’t know how they are now. I want to meet them and try to put their front paws on the tip of my nose.

I can’t stand it, so I tease with a nearby cat. Fortunately, unlike in the city, cats are allowed to keep outside in this area if the rules are followed. So I always have cat food in the storeroom in case of a sudden encounter, to see if there are any wandering cats coming to my house. Because my targets are cats, I watched eagerly like a tiger in the same group as cats. Well, it’s not so easy to meet them.

The essential point of my closing my life

The other day, I happened to hear a long interview with the actor Maiko Kawakami on a late-night (early-morning) radio program for elderly listeners, and it made a strong impression. The title is “Listen to the essential point of my closing my life“, and cats appear as one of the topics.

Ms. Kawakami is a cat supporter who also posts about her relationship with cats on social media, but she says that her view of life and death has changed in her life with cats. Nowadays, the world has become a world where you can live longer due to the development of medical technology, but is it okay to be connected to a tube in the hospital until the end of your life? She wants a peaceful time at home. When cats die, they stop eating of their own free will, reduce their physical strength, and die of their own free will… Well, this is “the essential point of my closing my life”. While I listened to the radio, I nodded deeply and was surprised. Because my partner and I used to talk about this kind of thing all the time.

I think you should praise them for surviving their lives..

My partner spent her childhood in the northern part of Hokkaido. As the daughter of a dairy farmer, she must have learned a lot from her skin in her daily life covered with animals such as cows, sheep, dogs, cats and chickens, and which that seems to be able to form a band that surpasses the Bremen musicians.

Growing up in the city of Osaka, I am usually overwhelmed by the idea of my partner’s “life”. The three cats I took care of at home, when it was finally time to say goodbye, I couldn’t help but say, “Poor thing. I think I’m going to miss you…” Each time my partner gives me some guidance. Don’t think of the cat’s death as “poor”, because they are creatures that fulfill their own lives. Since they have such a will, even if they leave this world in two months, whether they live longer to be 20 years old, whether they die of feline AIDS or a traffic accident, it is presumptuous for us humans to think that their deaths were poor or too early or too late. Rather, I think we should praise them for having survived their lives…

It’s a bit of a bold opinion, but it’s only convincing because she practices it herself. But if you take it that way, the lost cats will only leave happy feelings, saying “Thank you for leaving me many happy memories” ,and even if there is a time when we are a little dazed by the loss of pets, we will not think “I will never keep animals again” . A relationship in which the cats close themselves their own lives at their own pace, gently leaving warm memories gently for the people involved.

Oh, I shouldn’t have given them like that…

When I think about it, what my mother does these days has become similar to what cats do. First of all, she sleeps a lot. Almost every night, my partner calls Mom from Sapporo to confirm her safety, but it seems that she often doesn’t answer because she is already asleep by 8:30 pm. And in the morning, I come from my apartment to Mom’s house at 5:00 am, and after finishing various preparations, I go out to work at 7:30 am, but it seems that it’s probably after 8:00 am when Mom wakes up. In other words, her sleeping time in one night is estimated to be about 12 hours. On days when she doesn’t go to the day care service, she also takes a nap with the curled up style on the couch in the sun on the veranda from lunchtime until the evening.

In other words, 30 years after my father’s death, it is the ultimate “cat’s day”, completed by the gradual elimination of various things, who has enjoyed her life and her time alone in her favorite house without being disturbed by anyone . But, my 95-year-old house cat doesn’t want to close her life as much as the hair on the cat’s forehead, and she’s always checking the confectionery bowl, the fruit basket, and the fridge to see if there is anything tasty in there. On the day when I accidentally put a lot of her favorite food like dried sweet potatoes in a confectionery bowl, she eats as much as she can for the time being, and (for some reason) she puts the rest all back in the trash basket at the foot of her chair. ” Oh, I shouldn’t have given her so much…” This is also a classic episode of house cats.

Please take your time

I see, I thought it would be lonely living away from my cats, but were you close to me like this? Whether it’s adorable or not…I don’t think it’s a little bit unreasonable, but the way we live together is the same as that with a cat. I don’t interfere her and don’t give her orders.  I prepare her comfortable couch on the veranda. I am quietly involved only when Mom has to run some errands. And most importantly, delicious foods must be served in an appropriate amount…

To Mom
Your own “closing your life”, please take your time.
From your son who love cats

Written by Fukui
Translated by Yuko MAKINO (staff)